Post Grad: The First Year


Time seems to pass so quickly! I can't believe it's been one year since I graduated college! I know there's still a ton ahead of me but this past one year has brought so much change and new learning experiences that I thought I would take a moment to reflect on the year that's gone by – My first post grad year.

My boyfriend, David, and I moved to Chicago this year to pursue our first post-grad “real” jobs! It was exciting, stressful, scary, and fun all at the same time. I’ve loved making a home with David and having a place to call our own. At the same time, it wasn’t all fun and games. We went through stressful job hunts, financial struggles, and these things really put our relationship to the test. Coming out of college is always quite a freeing feeling, but when reality hits you and the structure of schooling disappears, a lot in your life changes very quickly. 

Moving day, one year ago!

Moving day, one year ago!

One of the biggest things I’ve noticed about post-college life is that hardly anyone knows what they’re doing and it really doesn’t hit you how little you know until you’ve been released out into the world. In a recent interview, I was actually asked what people commonly misperceive about me and kind of ended up blurting out what was top of mind at the time. Straight out of school, I accepted a position in a field that I enjoy, doing a job that I’ve really loved and I think what people often misperceive is that just because I held that position, then I knew what I was doing or knew where my career was going. This was not the case at all! I am incredibly grateful for my current job, but to be honest, I think that everyone is fumbling at this point in life. Whether you are in graduate school, have a full-time job, or have moved back in with your parents, none of us have this thing called life figured out. And you know what? I think that’s completely okay!

I'm very much a motivated person. I'm a perpetual optimist and am always looking for ways to to make today and tomorrow better than yesterday. But being a new graduate can be very tough when it comes to looking to the future and figuring out what you want to do for the rest of your life. It's a challenging transition because you go from having complete and total structure to having no structure whatsoever. At times, it feels like your education did nothing for you at all! I’m still learning how to take everything one day at a time and truly appreciating the stage of life that I am in. I am constantly reminding myself of how lucky I am to be at this point in life. A point in life where I can truly focus on myself. It is rare to be at a place where you do not have too many other obligations outside of taking care of yourself (and your cat!) and I want to continue to make the most of this opportunity to learn about myself through hobbies, career growth, travel, and new relationships.

Discovering new hobbies :) 

Discovering new hobbies :) 

Throughout this year, I’ve also seen the ups and downs of working a full-time job and being a part of a company. What we take for granted as students is that most of the time, our teachers truly care about our success and want us to be successful. When you become an employee of a company, the CEO of your company doesn't necessarily care as much about where you end up as your teachers at school do. You are very much on your own and very much responsible for your own success and your own well-being. It has been a struggle this past year, learning to prioritize myself and learning to fight for my own needs. I’ve recently decided to leave a position where I didn’t feel appreciated or valued as an employee and it has truly been an eye-opening experience. In school, you’re often rewarded by the amount of work you put in. If you study more, you’re more likely to earn a good grade which serves as recognition for your hard work. At a real world job, however, it doesn’t really matter how hard you work unless you have an organization, a manager, and a team that appreciates the work you’ve put in. Unfortunately, I had to learn this the hard way - but I’m incredibly hopeful and looking forward to starting a new position, and a new chapter in life. 

On a more personal level, this year of exploration has truly allowed me to learn more about myself. I always loved school, so I know that I need an environment where my role at work is constantly evolving, where I am constantly learning, and where my responsibilities change from day to day. I also know that a job is just a job and I’ve loved exploring interests outside of work as well. I’ve discovered new hobbies (home decorating, painting) and have even become more committed to blogging as both a way to share my experiences and keep myself sane after 40+ hours of work per week! 

If there is any advice I could give to new graduates this year is to embrace this time of uncertainty as an opportunity to explore. Whether that’s exploring the world, exploring your interests, or exploring your career - being a new graduate isa fleeting time in life and one that is incredibly valuable when it comes to learning about what you truly care about and want out of life. 

This post-grad first year has been an incredibly hard, yet exciting time for me. I’ve had some of the happiest moments, yet also some of the most lonely moments all wrapped up in the same year. I know I am definitely not the only post-grad feeling this way so if you’ve felt this way as well, I’d love to hear your thoughts. And if you’ve been there, done that already, what is your best advice for a new grad? 

Thanks for reading :) 

What Love Has Taught Me


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My boyfriend, David, and I just celebrated our 4th (dating) anniversary and sometimes I still can’t believe it’s been that long! Yet, at the same time, I feel like I’ve known him forever. I didn’t date much at all in high school and didn’t have a boyfriend until David came around during my freshman year of college. I like to think that the reason I didn’t date much is because I’ve always been an old soul. For as long as I can remember, I knew that I was looking for a long term relationship - even potentially marriage. I saw no point in wasting my time dating for fun because I’ve always been looking for someone that I felt like I could spend my life with. Yeesh I’m starting to sound like a Bachelor contestant - sorry! 

But in all seriousness, being in a long term relationship - and being in love - has taught me more than I could have ever expected. From the outside, it often looks like pure bliss. All you see from the outside are updated Facebook statuses, pretty engagement rings, and cutesy Instagram photos. You never really get to see the true grit and reality of what being in a relationship looks like. Love has its ups and downs. It’s great at times, and at other times, you just want to throw the towel in and give up! More than anything, however, no matter what the outcome, I feel that love always has something to teach us - so I thought I’d share some of the things I feel love has taught me in the past four years. 

It takes a long time to truly know a person

This never ceases to amaze me. I’ve spent four years dating David and almost five years getting to know him, yet there are constantly new things that I’m learning about him and things that he’s learning about me. People are incredibly deep and complication and it’s almost impossible to truly know a person through and through without spending years on end with them. Learning how long it really takes to get to know a person has given me so much more compassion for both people I’ve know for while and new people I meet.  

Having someone to be weird with is the most underrated part of being in love

This is my favorite part of being in a relationship! I love embracing my weirdness - that’s what makes me unique! Everyone is a little bit weird when they let their guard down and are completely and utterly themselves. When you’re in a relationship where you’re in love and completely comfortable with one another, you can be as weird as you want and that’s an incredibly freeing feeling! 

Love has a way of showing you the worst sides of yourself

Boy have I learned a lot about myself through being in a relationship! From strange little habits to giant character flaws you can learn a lot about yourself by seeing yourself through the eyes of another. For example, I am incredibly inpatient and almost irrationally so past the 8:00 hour but I would never have known it had I not spent loads of time being completely unreasonable towards David. While it can be jarring to see the worst sides of yourself on display, it’s also an incredible opportunity to recognize them and work to improve them. 

Mundane activities are not mundane activities

Growing up, I really didn’t see the point in going grocery shopping with my mom or eating a simple dinner with my family - it was just something I did because it was what my mom wanted. But now - I get it. Being in a relationship, even the most mundane activities become fun because they are with the ones you love. When going to the grocery store is awesome because you get to find new inspiration for slow cooker recipes together, you know it’s love :) 

It’s not about how opposites attract, and it’s also not about agreeing on everything

I feel like we always grow up with sayings and fables of how you should fall in love or what makes the most loving relationship when there really is no right or wrong way. No person is the same and as a result, no combination of two people will ever be the same. David and I agree on a lot of things but we also disagree on a lot as well. Believe it or not, we actually lean towards different sides when it comes to politics - and from what I’ve seen, this can be a huge deal breaker for a lot of people! The thing we do agree on? That we’re both not the most educated when it comes to politics, so we don’t force our opinions on one another. While David and I have very similar personalities (both homebodies and introverts), we have almost no common interests. I’m over here blogging and crafting away while he’d rather be out camping in the mountains. When it comes down to it, your partner doesn’t have to love everything you love, but they have to support your love for the things that you love and I think that’s what ultimately makes things work. 

Patience takes practice, change is slow, and compromise is hard.  

It’s true that you don’t want to change anything fundamental about yourself that goes against who you are, but when you’re in a relationship there’s something called compromise that in itself requires change. I find it unreasonable to expect a relationship not to involve change. Change is a natural part of life. Situations change, people change, and life itself changes. While change and compromise are slow, difficult processes that take immense amounts of patience to endure, if both you and your partner are committed to making things work, it’s something that you’ll go through together for the betterment of your relationship.

Love is never exactly what you expect it to be, but I truly think that it has so much to teach us. Whether it’s the end goal or just a chapter of our lives, there are always lessons that we can take away from a loving experience. David and I are four anniversaries down, and hopefully with an infinite number of anniversaries to go. What do you think are the most important things that love has taught you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. 

 

Thanks for reading♥